This isn't really an article on Transsexualism. It's about being civil online, and censoring those who might disagree with you. As a Transsexual, I get censored
just for being TS. However, when we start censoring ourselves, there's an issue.
One of the best things about working in cyberspace and having your own website is that you can control the content, by and large. Unlike some other websites
where anyone can post whatever they please, since I write all my own stuff for you to read, I can pretty much say what I like. You, dear reader then have two
choices: you may take it or leave it.
On other websites, people can and do say the oddest things. Sometimes, they don't realize what they are saying or doing; mistakes can happen when you can't
hear the tone of voice, see the body language, etc. Other times, they are looking for a fight because, doggone it, they're right. (Never mind what the facts might or
might not be.)
We need to remember that the rules for civil discourse in speaking online are the same as in a face to face conversation. If you wouldn't say something to my face,
then why say it online?
This brings me to the topic of censorship. Oh, not the government's version where stuff just disappears without a trace. I'm talking about something worse: self-
censorship by others, just because that person is spoiling for a fire-fight online, or because they are viewed as potentially inflammatory.
Now, before going on, let me say this much: there are times when something does need to go, whatever the reason. Some remarks are hurtful, nasty, ugly, or just
downright mean. They have become personal and vitriolic, and really should not be left for everyone to read.
But, who makes that choice?
Here on Sakuramina.com, I do. Since the only place for feedback (other than e-mail, which I can ignore) is my guestbook, I go through there every so often and
remove ads, etc. I generally leave negative criticism up; if it is in decent taste, and true, I'm a big girl and don't get my panties wadded up too easily anymore. (If
it's nasty or false, however, I delete it. I'm not that stupid.) That's the joy of being a website goddess; I get to make those decisions.
On other sites, there might be moderators, forum hostesses, etc. that make those choices. And if somebody really gets b*tchy, they are often removed from posting
privileges, membership, etc. That's the right of the web god or goddess who owns the site, who entrusts those moderators, forum hostesses, etc.
But…is that right? Sometimes, it is. After all-there are rules on those sites, and they should be followed, or you shouldn't be allowed to play in that particular sandbox
anymore.
But sometimes, I think we are too fast to yank someone just because they disagree with us. Or because they are challenging our opinions, just a bit harshly in the
process. Or, because they simply are looking for someone to vent on. (Goddess knows, I've been on the wrong end of a flame war more than once!) Sometimes, we
need to leave that stuff up; if for no other reason than a warning to others to avoid so-and-so. Sometimes, though we hate to admit it, that person is correct, like it or
not. (Sometimes, they are wrong. And the correction that comes teaches everyone a lesson.)
So, the takeaway here, loves, is that we all need to remember that the rules for civil discourse in speaking online are the same as in a face to face conversation.
Or, better yet, as The Momma used to tell me when I was a little girl: If you can't say something nice, just don't say anything at all.
Otherwise, you might just find that Abraham Lincoln was right: "Better to remain silent and be thought a fool than to speak out and remove all doubt."
